Concentrate

Oh Hey Back again
Probably because I deactivated my FB
And sweat that I kept on deactivate-activate-deactivate-activate it, so now FB can't stand my playfulness and punished me.
I have to wait for 24 hours to activate it again.
Okay, serious don't think deactivate it is so that easy, you will need to pay more for what you did.
FB thinks you have some other reason to deactivate it so it can control your activation.
Well maybe next time you might need to wait 48 hours to activate it again, perhaps.

The only thing I'm so confuse is that should I let it go?
Ah I just hate this feelings now
I don't know how to describe it by words
Waiting is not the proper way to be loved
And why am I waiting?
Wait for what?
Wait then lost it?
Wait then give up?
but! the only thing is that you don't know what you are waiting for!
You are already in the mist that WHAT is YOUR TRUE FEELING!
You don't know is your feeling right?
You don't know is it REAL?
You don't know what they both thinking!
You just kept on guessing and guessing and guessing, at the end you conclude yourself and made decision yourself! Weirdo....
Yes, WEIRDO!
You say you want to concentrate, but actually this will only make you more suffer, serious =__=

Whatever, no more emotional things.
Say something about my work at Maokong =)
This is the first time working as a waitress, to serve people, to do things I seldom do at home.
I sweep and mop the floor
I wipe the windows and doors
I say 'WELCOME' and 'THANK YOU' so often to customer
I take order and give explanation
I wash loads of dishes and it actually spoiled my pretty manicure T__T
I be the cashier and sometimes will count wrongly
I stand more than 8 hours
I can't be lazy because there is a BOSS and another Bigger BOSS who will never care people's feeling looking at US, and I don't know why this Bigger BOSS can be so cold-blooded yet the BOSS is so good so different.
I used to be lazy and kept on finding reason to make myself rest, but this time I will find things to do, I don't even dare to say "CAN I REST?", If I do how dare I!?!? OMG, other people are more tired than I am.
BUT, I'm happy working there
Feeling that I'm not wasting my live sitting in the office facing computer everyday.
At least I used my whole body cells to do something
Although I just take order, send foods and drinks, ask customer to pay the bills, but this job is really different from what I thought before.
The people there are NICE! Super NICE!

Working 6 days in a week, never letting myself to rest.
Night is for Piano, Day is for Administration work, Weekends are for Maokong.
I'm Part-Time queen =)
BTW, I choosed swimming to be my only entertainment.
I can swim nonstop NOW! ah hah! =)
Breaststroke, Freestyle ON la!

I can't believe that I can be a WORKAHOLIC
because I was a SUPER LAZY girl before,
thinking that WORKING is not fun
So, don't want to work wasting money and use parent's money
I guess my papa and mummy will be happy that I will think this way
I should thank them though giving me a chance to be independent

Conclusion:
Do not ever depends on other people, find your own way to solve the problem when you face obstacles
Especially when you are confused, just share your opinion and thoughts to people that you think will give you good advices, but of course FIND THE RIGHT PERSON.
When you solved it then only share also no harm.
Concentrate on what you are doing.
Typing then type properly
Working then work seriously

okbbciao~

停下來 想

Yes, I deactivated my FB without telling anyone
I'll be back anytime, I'm just not sure when should I go back to the virtual world
It's like a must to use FB
Doing discussion, chatting, updating your latest news, getting more closer with friends and families
So when one disappear from the virtual world, they will probably say:"Hey! you disappeared for so long", just because one stop using FB. =__=
I didn't disappear, I'm still alive okay.
If you really care someone you won't be updated through facebook yet to be updated in REAL world.

Well, what's the reason to deactivate?
Too many.
I thought a lot of things these days.
Staying in the virtual world will actually make one looks more foolish
Doing nothing but turn on Facebook and check others' News Feed, Like others' photos and status, Comment others' photos and status etc.
They typed "haha" but their facial expression is not like "HAHAHAHHAAH"
They typed "LOL" but they are actually serious typing 'L' & 'O' & 'L'. never even LAUGH OUT LOUD.
Me, a cyberchild, born on the 90s, used to Facebook everyday without any reason or aim and left out those important things to do, left out my true feeling.
I just can't believe that I will think so much whether it's TRUE or FAKE.
So I think I should stop for a while and think, think what I want to be, what I actually want.

Like everyone's habit, after you on your PC and internet browser, the first thing to do is to type: www.facebook.com.
These are the reason why people are so cool nowadays
Sitting in the MRT, in the bus or in the Office, all facing PC, smartphone etc
Everyone staying in their own little small world without interacting and thus causing communication breakdown.
It's impossible by saying these things out from me I know because I was these kind of people. duh~~

Anyway, my conclusion is waiting in the virtual world or being happy in the virtual world is not your true feeling. It's like "aiya, it's virtual only, no need to take it serious, they don't know me I don't know you, what to scared for". Those inventor who invented EMOTICON are great thinker, they make our world more colourful yet I think it makes people feelings worsen. Some people will take things serious; but some will think it's virtual and won't believe what they seen. So that's the problem with these VIRTUAL world, making things to be in between TRUE and FAKE.

I'm finding my own way to live normally and REAL
I will still use facebook but in another kind of view.
I guess so.

ciao~

依賴

有時候我只想找一個傾訴的對象而不是一個聽我抱怨的對象
原來我的傾訴就算是抱怨
maybe 我應該從新思考自己的個性、語氣
把自己放進別人的鞋子裡聽聽我自己
看看自己是長什麼樣子
瞭解我在講話在發呆的時候是什麼樣子

從小我習慣依賴父母
外面遇難可以依賴爸爸
面對難題可以依賴媽媽
電腦壞了依賴大哥
不敢做的事情可以依賴二哥
課業鋼琴問題可以依賴姐姐
懶惰的時候可以依賴妹妹
來到台灣我必須獨立
我依賴我自己

原來我這麼容易可以找到依賴的人
但是我似乎弄錯了
就算是朋友我也不能像對家人一樣的依賴
no 我太熱情太自作多情 是嗎？
我必須開始收斂自己的想法
我還是會依賴你們但是我第一個會依賴的還是我自己先
謝謝你們願意讓我依賴一點，也讓我欣慰
我會找尋屬於自己的重心
再次深入瞭解自己的個性
思考做人的目的

順順利利的生活反而不會讓我覺得自己長大
往逆境前進 跌倒 和碰釘子 才讓我長大了一點點
MIND 的成長
是需要時間的磨練才能變得更成熟
很高興我來到這裡
遇到這麼多奇妙的人
我相信這次的暑假很難忘
我不敢再想未來
現在的事情沒有做完
做完了我至少有一點點的機會決定自己的未來

天真就是我
邪惡也是我
我很難捉摸
因為我是天蝎座的林慧君